Do you/have you destroyed your old journals?

[valley]

Hi there. :) I've been using paper journal for years and years, and recently have been toying with the idea of destroying my old ones, whether through fire or trash can. This thought's been a roller coaster for me--whether to do it or not--and the folks I talked to over at embodiment seem to generally advise against burning old journals.

Have you ever destroyed a journal? Was it because of privacy problems, or did it feel like you were putting the past behind you? Do you regret it?

Have you ever thought about destroying one of your journals, text-only, art, or mix?


I, uh...would love to see an active paper journal community here on DreamWidth, so please comment with your thoughts. :)

Comments

[finch]

I've lost some, and I regret losing them, so for the most part I do hold on to mine. I've thought about destroying them, if only because they take up a fair amount of space and I almost never go back through them, but I'm not yet at a place where I can give them up. (All of my journals are mostly-text with the occasional art; I'm much worse at giving up/destroying my art.)

[wyrdkat]

I have destroyed a handful of journals. I'm not sure how many, but I had a lot too. I probably had about 50 at the time I dumped the ones that I did. I had tried reading them over again and I just wanted to put that stuff behind me. I was just tired of it.

I kind of regret getting rid of the earlier ones...mostly because they seem almost historic in a personal sort of way.

I had started keeping paper journals on a regular basis when I was about 15...that was over 20 years ago ;) But the early ones were kind of interesting even though reading them made me want to bang my head against the wall.

They were taking up too much room though and I just wanted to feel less weighed down with all that old baggage.

These were pretty much text only except for the doodling that always seems to creep in.

[butterflydreaming]

I have all of mine. I started at 15, and while I've had periods (months, years) of making a long entry nearly every day, overall I think I've been a sporadic journaler. It's only about 3 boxes worth. ^_~

The thing that I come back to, that prevents me from destroying them, is what happened once when I reread some of one. I found out that my memories of a certain time/events were completely distorted from what I wrote happened. I feel that carrying around my journals keeps me true. I can grow toward the sky because I have solid roots.

I've been emotionally unstable through much of my life. Journaling helps. Keeping the journals helps. The bad times -- as contained in my words -- are part of me. They are sometimes inconvenient, but I don't want to lose them.

And besides that, most of them are beautifully bound, with gorgeous paper. Many of the blanks were gifts.

If you do destroy them, destroy them thoroughly, else they might end up being dug out of the trash/recycling by someone. Destruction by drowning (soaked in a bucket for a while) would be as thorough, and safer, than by fire.

[valley]

I've journaled partially to keep me from forgetting things that I've been through, and partially as a sort of therapist, so I understand your point. I keep coming back to wondering if I really want to erase all those feelings.

[butterflydreaming]

It's funny, because I'm reading a non-fiction book about the value -- social importance, even -- of forgetting. It's focused on "digital memory", all the stuff we put online & is created by our online presence. One of the points he makes is that analog memory, such as things written by hand, makes us selective. (This is a good thing.) In contrast to digital memory, the things we take the time to write are things of significance. In contrast to, say, a Facebook status update, a journal entry (by hand) includes reflection beyond the simple moment.

Also, I recently came across some advice to a woman who was uncertain of what to do about her old engagement ring. She was advised that, for as long as she was unsure, not to do anything. To put it away, and give time to let herself sort out her feelings.

[valley]

What turns me off of digital journaling is that it's so easily lost. It does make me feel better to physically write something!

That's what I think I'll be doing with my journals right now--I think I'll wait until I'm 110% sure I want to keep them or lose them before I take action. Right now I think I'll keep them stored up.

[roadnotes]

I've destroyed a couple of journals, but usually I just tear the pages I've written on out of the book, staple them together, and discard the remainder of the book. I feel as if no matter how stupid my words were, when I look at them, they were mine, they were true reflections of what I thought and felt at the time, and as such should be kept.

[valley]

I was reading through my old Embodiment entry and I recognized your username! :)

I'm thinking more and more about this selective editing, of only taking out certain pages or only keeping certain sections. It seems like a very good medium.